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Gratitude, Comedy, Intense Horror, & Making People Cry

Ha. Making people cry…
Not in a mean way; it has to do with how I found out I’m good at writing. You’ll see. It’s kind of a longer story, but you can skip it, ya know, if your breath stinks like crap. Otherwise you should probably just read the whole thing. Click on the links and check out the other people, not just me. It’s not just about me all the time, you guys. You have to realize and come to terms with that. K, enough silliness. Here’s what’s on the docket:
- A GOOD THING: All of You!
- AUTHOR SPOTLIGHT: Brian Bowyer, author of Flesh Rehearsal
- RANDOM THOUGHT: How I Found out I’m Good at Writing
- UPDATES: Still Workin…
- UPCOMING STUFF: Mike Logan’s Comedy Antics in Grand Rapids, Michigan
A GOOD THING: All of You!

I’m grateful for Pharmhouse Wellness and Cocoon Art Space in Grand Rapids, MI, for being super cool and selling my books! Kent District Library has a few copies and they’ve actively promoted them and got them checked out a few times.
Thanks to everyone who reads this and follows me on social media (@tallonwrites on all of them), and most of all to the people who’ve supported my writing! Thanks for reading my book, thanks for sharing it with someone else, and generally being cool as shit.
AUTHOR SPOTLIGHT: Brian Bowyer, author of Flesh Rehearsal

Brian Bowyer is a phenomenal writer. It sounds like just about all he does is read, write, and play the guitar. My kinda guy.
He wrote Flesh Rehearsal and sent me a copy. Insanely intense from the start. Seriously, if you get triggered easily, stay away. If you like a wild ride, check him out. Here’s the description on Amazon, where you can get a copy for yourself in ebook, paperback, or hardcover:

Following years of abuse, Gretchen runs away from home after her sister dies by suicide. While on the road, she accepts a ride from Jacob and Amelia Sloane, who are driving back to Los Angeles from Chicago. Gretchen knows their dead father was the lead singer in a famous band. After hearing Gretchen sing, they convince her to be the vocalist in their rock band and to live with them in Los Angeles, where Gretchen meets and falls in love with the girl of her dreams.
-Amazon Product Page
Meanwhile, elsewhere in the city, a predator lurks. The Lobotomizer—a serial killer terrorizing Los Angeles—plots an attack that threatens to ruin Gretchen’s happiness. Can she and her friends find and stop the killer before the unthinkable happens?
Fans of Clive Barker, Stephen King, and Poppy Z. Brite will love this chilling novel.
RANDOM THOUGHT: How I Found out I’m Good at Writing
I f–king HATED school when I was a student. Not always–there was a time I just didn’t really want to be there. But from about middle school on, I f–king HATED school. So I did what any cool kid would do and pretty much sat school out. I went but I didn’t study, take part in classroom discussions, or anything like that. Unless I liked the teacher and (this is important is important: “and” not “and/or”–“and”) the subject. If I liked the teacher OR the subject, I didn’t intentionally disrupt their class. If I liked both, I participated.
I had a teacher in high school named Mr. Malloch. He played baseball (not like back in the day, but still actively played) which made the jocks appreciate him, smoked cigarettes with the seniors outside which made him cool to the more rebellious students, and generally treated people well if they respected his classroom and the job he was trying to do.
So one day in Mr. Malloch’s 10th grade history class and we were assigned to write a paper about the Holocaust as our unit project. We were given the option of doing a formal essay or writing a historical fictional that incorporated stuff we’d learned. I’d never seen this option before. Not that I remember. (Again, majorly tuned out during 91% of high school (ADD, no meds, no Fs given).) I thought it was interesting (and I still hate writing essays to this day) so I chose that.
I waited until the night before it was due to even start, but I paid attention in class and had the textbook. (Before widespread, fast internet, people.) So I started writing around 8 or 9pm. I wrote until about 4am. My mom and dad proofread what I wrote for me in the morning. They let me sleep in a little bit, missing the first period of school. Probably because it was the first time in my high school career that I actually motivated myself to do homework. (One of the last, too.)
I wrote a story called Remembering Josef, about a Jewish boy who lived through the majority of the holocaust and died shortly after the allies came and liberated the concentration camps. The person was completely fictitious. It helped that Ich spreche Deutsch (I speak German (not really (I took 3 years in middle and high school))), so I sprinkled a little in there on top of my immaculate storytelling, mixed with sad and horrible facts, and turned it in. Then I pretty much forgot about it, hoping it would take him awhile to grade and get back to us.
But he graded it that night.
The next day, class started with Mr. Malloch sitting on a stool in front of the class saying, “I don’t normally do this, but somebody wrote a historical fiction paper that blew me away and I’m going to read it to the class. After I read it, the author can choose to remain anonymous or take credit publicly–that’s up to them. But someone put a lot of time and work into this and it deserves to be acknowledged.”
He read the story. I got really nervous. Like, lie to go to the bathroom and not come back. (Which I did once in middle school, haha.) I tried not to look at anyone, lest they saw the embarrassment on my face. But a few paragraphs into the story I remembered, I’m flunking or almost flunking most of my classes, no one will think it’s me.
And that comforted me, so I eventually relaxed and looked around the room. Everyone was quiet. Everyone was attentively listening. Some of the girls were openly crying while the boys just did that thing where you open your eyes really wide a bunch of times to try to dissipate the water threatening to form tears. A few people audibly gasped at different parts.
After Mr. Malloch was done, he stayed quiet for a minute. Then he said, still looking at papers in his hands, “If the author wants to take credit, you can do it now. If no one says anything by the time I get back to my desk, we’ll just start class.”
I waited a moment to claim the story, just to look around and see what people thought. A few people asked said, “Did _________ write it?” And __________ said, “No.” A few more kids asked, “Who was it then?”
I raised my hand, slowly, still not sure if it was a good idea. Everyone looked at me confused. Then Mr. Malloch said, “Great job on this, Chris. Thank you.”
So I say, Thank YOU, Mr. Malloch. I honestly didn’t know I was good at anything before I saw the reaction something I wrote could get.
UPDATES: Still Workin…
I got nothing. Still editing the first half of my new novel. I’m planning on releasing it right around the start of summer. Work until the kids are out of school. Then parent, promote, and tinker with some of the new ideas I’ve already got in my head.
UPCOMING STUFF: Mike Logan’s Comedy Antics in Grand Rapids, Michigan
Mike Logan, besides being a good buddy of mine, is also as hilarious as he is hard-working. He’s been in comedy a decade or so, and he produces the best comedy shows in West Michigan (including all the Grand Rapids Don’t Tell Comedy shows!) Check out Mike Logan’s Instagram for more info, and follow him for fun content and future updates.

Thanks for coming! If you like this, share it with someone. Check out my book! You’ve come this far. C’mon…
-CT

Christopher Tallon is the author of the dark, adventurous, time-travel novel Switchers.